5 useful ideas for how to deal with a breakup
Heartbreak is no fun.
The rose just does not smell sweet anymore. It feels as though you are lugging a heavy suitcase around chained to your neck. The world seems like a gloomy and hopeless place. You may even feel physically ill as feelings of desolation surround you.
It might have been necessary, sensible, and the right decision, but a breakup is never easy. Even if it is a mutual decision, it is not a pleasant feeling. You are, inevitably, left with feelings of failure, inadequacy, and depression. This is why it is important to know how to deal with a breakup, so you know how to swim to the top when you hit rock-bottom.
How can one best deal with a breakup? How can move on?
Vent and reinvent
Bottling your feelings is a definite no-no. Slowly, allow yourself to let go. Some people talk it out, and some write diaries. Do whatever helps you get the feeling of dejection out of your system. Once you have released yourself from the shackles of negativity, you can reinvent yourself. Get a new haircut or explore a new hobby. These symbolic changes will help you look at yourself in a new and promising light.
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Eat right, feel light
Gorging on sweets and fried items is the first recourse when depression sets in. It may seem helpful but sadly is not. As tempting as it may appear, it is detrimental even in the short run and won’t help you in getting over a breakup. You gorge, gain weight, and then you feel heavy and depressed. It is a vicious cycle. Stop the wheel before it turns at all or, better yet, change its course.
It may seem difficult and unappealing, but eating a balanced diet is recommended. Fresh food can bring a fresh perspective. It makes you feel cleaner and more energetic inside out. This makes it easier to want to move on.
Focus on the now
Resist the urge to revisit every mistake and the hurtful remarks made in the relationship. It is natural to feel regret and wish things had turned out differently. However, beware! There is no end to this line of thinking. Perhaps your relationship had run its course and its time had come. Accept it. Focus on the now.
Meditation can be tremendously useful in this. It uplifts your spirit and rejuvenates your body, mind, and soul. Most importantly, it teaches you to let the past go and allow the future to unfold in its own time. Meditation helps you only unwrap the gift before you – the present.
The more, the merrier
Mutual friends may mean well. But talking to them about a failed relationship can be regressive and unproductive. They may not be able to come up with ideas on how to get over your ex. Widen your circle of friends and acquaintances. Fresh faces can lead to new conversations. You will be able to discuss vastly different subjects without a special effort. Change of subject can change your thinking. This will help you move on to bigger and more positive aspects of your life.
The processes taught in the Art of Living Meditation and Breath Workshop will remove all the negative energy from your consciousness. Do it now.
Alone ≠ Lonely
The most difficult thing about getting over a breakup is facing the lonely alternative. You feel alone. You get yourself to believe that you are alone. However, this is not a bad thing. You may feel that you will never learn how to get over your ex. Although he/she may have seemed perfect, that is not the only perfection you can aspire to have in your life.
With every move, life opens up a world of possibilities for you. There is a host of experiences waiting for you to live them. Don’t be afraid to be on your own. The greatest learning happens when you walk the road alone. So, enjoy the challenge and rejoice in your company.
When milk goes bad, it becomes curd. When curd breaks, it becomes butter; when butter breaks, it becomes ghee. Similarly, after every breakup, something good arises.
- Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar
It is not uncommon to go back and forth with feelings. Just when you think you are getting over a breakup, a small reminder will take you back in time. This will make you question all the progress you thought you made. You might not believe in your ability to move on. But, even this temporary regression is part of the process. It will, eventually, vanish and you will be able to go on with life one fine day. Believe in the inevitability of this truth.
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And, here’s how to get over your ex
- Accept the sadness as a natural part of the healing process.
- Don’t downplay or deny the happy times that you spent in the relationship. Preserve the good memories.
- Don’t set hard limits on how quickly you need to get over your ex. Everything operates in its own time. Mending a broken heart cannot have a deadline.
- Don’t dwell on the past. Keep yourself active and engaged.
- Surround yourself with positive friends, good books, and indulge in your hobbies.
- Pay attention to your diet and follow healthy food habits.
- Include exercise in your daily regimen. Go for a nature walk to clear your head.
- Compose and relax your mind with healthy practices such as yoga and meditation.
